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Thursday, January 8, 2015

Goals for Your Marriage

“Where there is no vision, the people perish.” –Proverbs 29:18
 


Every year around this time, we begin scribbling out our New Year’s resolutions—exercise more, find a mate, save more. Ironically, very few couples take the time to sit down together to plan their marriage goals. This is mostly because we have the mindset that once we get married, everything else will be fine and we will live happily ever after. But if you’re married, you know that it takes work to keep this boat afloat! Statistics show that nearly 50% of U.S. marriages end in divorce. This is largely because couples spend more time tending to everything else, but neglect the very thing that matters most—their marriage.

{MY LESSON}
Tristen and I started marriage goal planning a few years ago after my ex-boss shared her experience with doing it with her husband. The first time we shared, I was surprised to learn some of Tristen’s goals. I didn’t know that he desired to achieve so much! I realized at that moment how important it was for us to have this annual goal setting for our marriage.

{PUT IT INTO ACTION}
Designate one person to write down the goals and store it somewhere safe to revisit during the year. I usually keep track of it in my phone and email it to Tristen.

1. Individual Goals- lose 50 lbs. by November, get certification by the end of the year, read 1 book per month

2. Household Goals- save $500/month for 6 month safety net, clean out garage by the end of March, cook at least 3 times per week

3. Marriage goals- This is the time to ask yourselves, “What do I want my relationship to look like?” Set aside 1 hour of quality time in the evening where no cell phones are allowed, be intimate at least 3 times per week, put into practice 1 CC’s Pieces per week

The objective is to list 2-4 goals under each category. Keeping the list short increases the likelihood of achieving your goals because you’re able to focus on a few things at a time. It’s also important to be specific and quantify your goals as much as possible (i.e. lose 50 lbs. by November). Don’t forget to discuss what obstacles may come up when working towards your goals and possible solutions!

Marriage does not have to be a struggle. Setting goals in your marriage is just as important as setting your professional and personal goals. In fact, your marriage should take first priority over your career, finances and children. Ultimately, your relationship with your spouse will determine how successful you are outside of the home. So, let’s start a new annual tradition: setting marriage goals.

Don’t forget. Plan goals for your marriage.

Credit:
http://www.goalsettingstrategies.com/goals_for_marriages.html

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